Chapter 92: Teacher Xu, I’ve Been Here All Along
Xu Nianshen’s lips brushed her cheek, a smile glimmering at the corner of his eyes.
“Why?”
“Even though I have money now—one million—it doesn’t feel real, because it wasn’t earned by me.”
She had told him before about the money Grandfather Lin had given her.
“So you want to earn money yourself?”
“Of course. I want to earn a lot on my own.”
“Then why buy a big mansion just to take care of me?”
“Because you’re my boyfriend, aren’t you?” Lin Yuejiu blinked her innocent eyes.
“Normally, isn’t it the boyfriend who earns money to take care of the girlfriend?”
“That’s what’s normal, but I refuse to follow the norm.”
Xu Nianshen chuckled softly, tightening his hold around her waist, his breathing slow and deep.
Sensing something was wrong, Lin Yuejiu asked gently:
“What’s the matter?”
“Jiujiu… I can’t give you any promises right now.”
“Why not?”
“We’re still too young. The future is full of uncertainties. I can’t be sure I’ll always be part of your future, nor that we’ll truly make it to the end. Couples who start in school and walk together all the way to marriage are very rare. And right now, I have nothing—nothing I can give you. That’s why I don’t dare to promise you anything lightly.”
His eyelashes trembled faintly, the tips of his fingers turning white.
Lin Yuejiu said nothing.
The night breeze drifted past, rustling the leaves.
After a long silence—just when Xu Nianshen thought he wouldn’t get an answer—she spoke.
“It’s okay.”
He looked up, meeting her gaze head-on.
Shifting to face him fully, Lin Yuejiu cupped his cheeks in both hands.
“It’s okay. I understand if you can’t promise me anything now. What you said makes sense. But I don’t mind. I can wait.”
Xu Nianshen lowered his eyes, his throat dry, his voice hoarse.
“A girl’s youth is precious. I don’t want you to waste it on someone uncertain. It wouldn’t be worth it.”
She forced him to look at her.
“If I think it’s worth it, then it is. It’s my choice who I spend my youth on.” Then, suddenly, she smiled brightly.
“And honestly, I don’t think I could ever meet another person like you—someone who understands me, cares for me, thinks ahead for me, protects me so gently, gives his tenderness only to me, and stays with me through my youth.”
“Xu Nianshen, I’m an orphan. I don’t know how to hold onto love, but I can speak my heart, my true thoughts. Whether or not you can promise me anything now, I’ll wait—for the day when you can.”
Perhaps they were still too young. Perhaps these words might even sound naïve, because what did teenagers know about love? But youth was fiery, and so was their love.
Maybe, when they grew older, the one by their side wouldn’t be the same person from back then. But as long as they could look back and feel it had been worth it—no regrets—that was enough.
Lin Yuejiu didn’t regret saying these words. They were her truest feelings. Wasting her youth didn’t matter, as long as it was spent on him.
Before, no one had taught her how to love someone. She had always thought that making others happy was the best way. That was how she tried to love the Lin family. But later, she realized—that wasn’t true love.
She still didn’t quite know how to describe love. But what she did know was that love, at the very least, meant letting the other person feel it. Xu Nianshen had given her that feeling. He had been by her side since she was seven, growing up with her. Whenever she faced difficulties, he was always the first to help. He would cover for her mistakes, protect her, tutor her, comfort her when she was sad, and give her the light to keep moving forward.
Lin Yuejiu believed she would never meet another person like him in her lifetime. Her once dim and colorless life had been painted with vibrant shades of youth, and every one of those colors carried traces of Xu Nianshen. Some hues existed only because of him. Without him, her life would be missing a huge piece—something she could not allow.
Xu Nianshen’s dark eyes locked tightly on her, as though he wanted to imprison her within his gaze forever.
Lin Yuejiu leaned in, her lips brushing his.
The arm around her waist tightened.
She didn’t move, only pressed her lips lightly against his.
He moved instead, parting his lips to capture hers, kissing gently as if memorizing her, tracing the shape of her lips again and again.
When he finally let go, she wrapped her arms around him, resting her head on his shoulder and rubbing lightly against his neck. Her voice was soft, tender:
“Teacher Xu, I’ve always been here. Don’t be afraid.”
Xu Nianshen held her tightly, as if he wanted to merge her into his very being.
He had seen her changes all along—the way she grew to love the violin more and more, how she shone brilliantly on stage, how more and more people came to admire her. Sometimes, when she discussed violin with Huang Weixue, he couldn’t even join the conversation. A strange sense of insecurity gnawed at him. He feared she would drift farther and farther away, slipping beyond his grasp.
As if sensing his unease, Lin Yuejiu gently patted his back.
—
That teacher returned again, seeking Lin Yuejiu. But this time, she no longer panicked. Even though, as always, he gave no feedback after her performances, it no longer bothered her.
Huang Weixue teased her:
“What, you’re not nervous anymore?”
“There’s nothing to be nervous about. He never says anything anyway. I just play because I like it.”
When she wasn’t at the association, she stayed at the Xu household, practicing with Xu Nianshen. Together, they signed up for summer competitions, learning and improving side by side. Whenever they competed, they always won together. People even joked about them being a “scholar couple”— excelling as a pair.
Xu Nianshen smiled at her.
“Did you hear that?”
“Hear what?”
“That I became excellent together with you.”
Lin Yuejiu grinned back.
“Isn’t it the other way around? You’re the one who led me here. I never used to participate in any of this.”
They bumped their certificates of excellence together.
Day by day, summer slipped away. As the two-month break neared its end, the teacher once again asked her to play. Lin Yuejiu was used to it by now—she closed her eyes and played her piece. When she finished, she expected silence as usual.
But unexpectedly, he spoke.
“Compared to before, you’ve improved a great deal. Your playing now carries emotion—it draws people in.”
The praise stunned Lin Yuejiu. It took her a moment before she bowed in gratitude.
“Thank you, teacher.”
“You’ve built a name for yourself now, gained experience. Do you want to step onto a bigger stage?”
Without hesitation, Lin Yuejiu nodded.
“Yes.”
“I have a quota here.”
“A quota for what?”
